If we are faithless, he remains faithful, for he cannot deny who he is. (2 Timothy 2:13)
When we lose someone we love; grief takes us over and it becomes so unbearable that we want to give up on life. We lose our faith and any hope of anything ever being the same again without them.
This was me when I heard the words of the doctor tell my older sister that her cancer was incurable and that she would only have three months left to live. The details of her options brought me into an emotional standstill but I knew I had to dig down deep to find enough strength for my sister at that moment.
As I wheeled her back into her hospital room and tucked her in for a nap, I escaped into the hospital hallway looking for a place to unload my broken heart, crying out to God; why?
When death catches us off guard there seems to be no instruction manual; we loose the control we thought we had to fix this problem and we turn to God in our grief and anger praying for a miracle.
It was during this time of emptiness that led me to reach out to others who had also experienced this kind of grief. Through them, I was inspired to turn back to God, in the faith that I had always proclaimed to help others. I had believed that God would not abandon me, that no matter what trial I faced, His steadfast love and faithfulness would see me through. I also believed that death was not the end for my sister but that she would begin a new life in a beautiful place called heaven, a belief that said even if she died, she would still live.
I encourage anyone to hang onto the promises of God in His word. I would like to share two of
my favourite scriptures that helped me get through the bad days of my grief journey.
Deuteronomy 31:6 – Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of
them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.
Philippians 4:13 – I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
As I celebrate each year of my sister’s death, my grief is triggered once again piercing my heart. I have realized that grief really never ends; but it changes. It is a passage; not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness nor is it a lack of faith. It is the price of love.